What I Ask Myself After Going on a Date


Two weeks ago, I shared some of the conversation I have with myself before going on a date. These are moments of alternately being critical of and being kind to myself. These moments are vulnerable and filled with anxiety. Maybe you were able to empathize. Maybe you saw yourself in that conversation. Maybe this helped you understand what the person on the other side of the dating spectrum might feel like.

This week, I thought I would share some of the conversation I have with myself after going on a date.

I ask myself, was he kind?
I ask myself, did he seem interested in you?
I ask myself, did he ask good questions?
I ask myself, did the conversation feel natural?
I ask myself, did he seem nervous?
I ask myself, did he put some effort into his physical appearance for this date?
I ask myself, did the time go quickly?
I ask myself, did you find his personality attractive?
I ask myself, did you find him physically attractive?
I ask myself, is there anything you talked about that you want to follow up on?
I ask myself, is he relationship material, or only good for/looking for casual dating?
I ask myself, can I see him fitting in with my friend group?
I ask myself, did you feel more anxious or happy while you were with him?
I ask myself, did he respect your boundaries?
I ask myself, did he seem open to talking about himself?
I ask myself, does he have ambition?
I ask myself, if you had met at a party, would you have been interested in him? Why or why not?
I ask myself, was there a connection?
I ask myself, would I rather just be friends with this person?
I ask myself, if he doesn't want a second date, would I be disappointed because I really wanted to see him again, or because I feel rejected?
I ask myself, did he seem honest?
I ask myself, is he your "type?" Is it okay if he isn't?
I ask myself, did he make his intentions clear?
I ask myself, did smiling during the date feel easy or forced?
I ask myself, was he polite?
I ask myself, are we too alike?
I ask myself, are we too different?
I ask myself, where can we go from here?

I would love to hear some of your pre and post-date analysis!

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